Author Andrea Dean Van Scoyoc

Chapter 1

Boy, have I screwed things up.

I never meant this to happen, but luck, I should have known it would. All my life nothing ever went right, never turned out the way I wanted it to.

What on earth made me think that in death it would? Or rather should I say, undeath?

Yeah, that’s right. My name is Electra Carmichael and I’m undead specifically, a Vampire. Oh, it’s not that fancy or interesting, believe me. How I wish it was.

What I discovered after my “host” turned me, one drunken night at a local club and surrounded by freaks that were in no way like me. I went there on a dare. Yep, I just keep racking up the mistakes and then ended up like this. I found that the life of a Vampire is nothing at all like Hollywood has made it out to be, believe me.

I used to watch all the cool Vampire shows, dream of living in the night forever, dream of being so cool, carefree and having the world at my feet.

Okay, so I watched way too many Vampire shows.

At first, I was upset, angry, I cried and I broke things. For a while, I was despondent and often watched the sun rise, blinds drawn of course, through those slivers of light that barely filtered through the darkness, thinking that I’d just walk outside one, last time, before I found out that even that was bullshit.

The sun hurts, have no illusion, but that’s all.

Imagine having scalding water poured on you and your skin blister and burn.

Nice huh? Well, that’s what being in the sun is like.

It might be more merciful to simply explode or crumble away as the movies show.

But just like I was afraid in life that I’d fail at suicide, in death, I was just as afraid of failing. I guess I’d have been right or like my luck in life would have been, had I tried it then, the ‘suicide’ would have been painful and not what I wanted.

So, suicide was out and I simply existed. That was all for a time, I simply existed, feeling sorry for myself, bemoaning my fate and thinking I was better off dead.

Then, when I got tired of feeling sorry for myself, I decided to do something about my fate. I was never one for ‘pity-parties’ and death wasn’t going to change that. So, I donned my best clothes, made my hair look extra special, slathered on make-up, something I hadn’t done in a while, and decided that I’d be like the characters I’d idolized on television.

That worked for a while, but just as in life, I was never as popular or the “in-girl,” as I wanted to be. I wanted power, I wanted riches and I wanted to be the one whom everyone craved my company, attention and even simply my presence. I wanted people to flock to me anytime I walked through a door, I wanted drinks on the house. I wanted all that and more.

I was greedy.

I was greedy in life too, never appreciating what I’d accumulated for myself. I always wanted more. The more I got, it was never enough.

In a way, I guess this is payback.

Anyway, when I didn’t get the fame I wanted, I became bored, then angry. Then angrier until I decided that I’d use my powers for ultimate evil – getting back at those who’d wronged me in life. No matter how trivial their offense seemed, I was out for revenge and I’d get it.

The idea delighted me and for once, I was happy as a Vampire. If I was going to be miserable, I’d take as many people with me as I could. If someone had made me miserable in life, I’d make them miserable right back. This time with total impunity.

I wasn’t arrogant enough to think that I’d be able to just do whateverI wanted to get them back. No.

I may be pissed off and I may be out for revenge, but I’m not deluded and I know that television isn’t real life. I knew that I couldn’t kill someone and then have the “scene” miraculously change with me sitting in a nightclub, talking to my friends and having a drink as if nothing happened, while the cops bungle about looking for a mysterious killer.

I’d have to be skillful; I’d have to be crafty and I’d have to be careful. This is mylife, remember and nothing has ever gone my way.

Yes, I know I already said that, but I’m making the point again because you seriously have no idea what it’s like to be me in life or now in undeath.

The main object of my wrath was this nasty little tart. Okay, so I’m being nice. She is a bitch! I ‘met’ back in college a few years ago. I say ‘met’ because we had two classes together, but we hardly spoke and certainly were not friends.

From the moment the class started she dogged my every answer, nitpicking and ‘taking issue’ with every word I spoke, no matter how unimportant or irrelevant to herand all to the approving nods and smiles of the professor who was so far up her ass that if she’d stopped suddenly, he’d have been lost in the abyss of her wide ass.

  I know as it was rumored, he was banging a classmate or two.

I loathe and despise people like that and let me tell you, oh Hells bells, was this bitch full of herself! Snotty, arrogant and simply thinking she was all that andan after-dinner cigarette, I hated her from the first time we ever crossed words.

I even once told her exactly what I thought of her but as is typical with people like her, she played victim, ran

from the class crying and of course I was the Anti-Christ for daring to speak so horribly to such a sweet girl.

GAG!

But no matter how badly it turned out for me, I still

take some pride in that day and my caustic-as-acid, words.

The rest of the class except for one fellow student who saw her for what she really was and hated her as much as I did, refused to speak to me again and the professor treated me like I had the Plague.

Anyway, she lives in Minnesota and though I wasn’t sure which town she ‘dwelled’ in but figured I’d go to her general area, slip into the sub-culture she claimed to be such a major part of, and work my worst.

I always figured that she was so evasive when asked, because she’d be afraid someone might come and bust her for being a fake and lying all those years, she bullshitted her way through college.

It took some work, more than I’d wished it to, but I finally found her and followed her around town for a few days, learning her schedule and then I pounced, doing every horrible thing I could think of, to her.

I figured she’d become a Carouche, a Vampire that feeds on the blood of rats and other animals, due to her being such a low-life liar in real life, always exaggerating her accomplishments. But no, she couldn’t go that quietly and be the filth that I always knew her to be!

She became everything I wanted to be, the queen of the limelight, the one whose presence everyone desired, people clambered to be near her everywhere she went and it made me sick.

Even worse, her fame was my fault. I’d made this bitch even more of a queen than she’d fancied herself to be.

My beautiful plan had backfired and it was entirely myfault. I should have just killed her or left her to die a horrible death and been done with it. But no, just like with

everything else in my life I tried to do, it backfired and left me miserable and furiously pissed off.

But I’m not taking this one lying down. I already have my plane ticket for a midnight flight, which I think is kind of poignant. I’ll arrive right at the height of all the parties and a bag full of goodies for ‘her Highness.”

I will have my revenge. For once, damn it, I will get what I deserve in this life and I’ll have my way. If it takes me the rest of eternity, I’ll get her.

Currently on Kindle https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0F2J9SWJG

On May 27th it goes live in paperback and soon to be live on audible and hardcover